Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Shining the Light




Good morning, God. Came to tell you a few things.


I've been missing you and didn't even know it. Isn't that something? Funny how that is... you don't know you miss someone so bad until you talk to them again.


It's been so nice going to your house. You got the nicest family. They are all so warm and loving. And the hugs! What a nice bonus.


And in the midst of the warmth I discovered the foundations of my soul shaken. There is so much I don't know. I fear I am too old to learn it all, that maybe my faith won't be enough. I know on some level that is just plain silly. But other levels tell me I better get snapping.


And you know... sometimes... it's all just so overwhelming. Not that it's a bad thing. There are times the feeling of being overwhelmed is because I feel so loved. And then, of course, there is the other brand of overwhelm, the one that makes you question your very existence. It is then that I turn to you the most... for reassurance. And always, there you are, waiting.


I can't tell you how much that means to me. But then you already know, huh? I am told you know everything about me - and long before I ever do. That's some job you have! I can't even wrap my mind around it. But then that's good. That's what makes you God and not me.


I love and appreciate all you are doing in my life right now. You know, I thought it was over. "Over" meaning without purpose any more. But each day you reveal things to me that I can begin to see more clearly that the road ahead is much different from what I had planned. Just goes to show how much I really don't know after all.


But what I am most excited about is that feeling I keep getting that what is waiting is so much more than I could (or would) have dared to dream about... You're like that... full of surprises.


Well, I've kept you long enough. You're so very busy. But I thank you each day that you are never too busy to listen to my heart's yearning. And thanks for leaving the Light on for me.


Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Five Heads?


Cry, cry, cry! We're so fickle we humans. How do you stand us. God? I can barely stand myself.

And yet...

Amidst the tears and the uncertainty I was acutely aware of being pain-free. Isn't that glorious?

She told me to thank you for the fear. I looked at her as if she had five heads. But You know she was right. I knew it too but didn't want to admit it.

So once more I stand at the threshold of yet another adventure. What awaits? You and Your Infinite Wisdom and Grace will enlighten me, I am sure.

Thank you for another wonderful, normal day, God. It's all good when I look to You.